Give Me Peace

 I want you to close your eyes for a second and just listen. What do you hear? 

Kids in the next room, arguing over legos? 

Sirens three blocks down? 

Construction in the park down the street? 

Your partner typing in the office? 

The radio? 

When was the last time you just sat and soaked it in? When did you last allow yourself a moment to just be? 

If you’re like me, those moments are rare (to say the least) and even when they happen, you feel guilty for having taken that time away from things you “should” be doing. The laundry. The dishes. Filling in this sheet for the boss. Prepping for a meeting. There’s always something that’s got priority, and usually a lot of somethings fighting for priority all at the same time. 

But one thing I think needs priority but almost never gets it is mental health. And part of keeping myself mentally healthy is allowing myself time to process. Sometimes I can process while doing some mindless, repetitive task, like folding laundry or scrubbing dishes, but the real processing happens when I allow my mind to actually relax. 

Something about life in 2020’s America says that if you’re sitting and doing nothing.- or even if you’re sitting and doing something, but that something isn’t “valuable” - then you’re wasting time. “Time is money” has taken on a new and almost sinister meaning in this age of telework and self-employment. There’s immense social pressure to manage your time well, which seems to mean “get enough work done,” rather than not burning yourself out. 

Luckily for all involved, an article in 2019 (The Burnout Generation, Anne Helen Peterson) brought the public eye around to the problem of working so much, or perhaps doing so much of the same thing, that we lose the ability to function in other areas of life. Burnout often results in things like depression, insomnia, and anxiety, all conditions that plague present-day Americans. 

So as a challenge to myself and a promise to future me, I want to take more time to just be. To sit and process. To absorb and comprehend and regenerate. I will try to spend at least 15 minutes in the morning, just sitting on the balcony and observing the world around me. Maybe with a cup of tea. Maybe in a hammock, if I can set one up. 

I have a life, and I deserve to live it, not just endure it.